The Best Revenge

Is revenge on your ex the right way to go given how hurt you feel? No! At  least not in my opinion anyway, however you can feel better just imagining doing some of the horrid deeds to them in the list below.

You’ve been dumped by your partner and you are shattered beyond belief. Feelings of anger, hurt, betrayal and humiliation surge through your body as the realization sinks in that the relationship and love you thought you shared with your partner is no more.

Would getting revenge on your now ex lover make you feel better. You bet it would! What kind of revenge would you carry out? There are many different, nasty, horrible tricks you could play to even the score, such as:

• Sand or sugar in their petrol tank
• Weed killer on your ex’s beautiful manicured lawn
• Egging their house or car
• Having their mail re-directed
• Disconnecting their power, gas or phone
• Disabling the hot water service (I had this one done to me)
• Brake fluid poured over their car
• Stealing their letter box
• Dumping garbage on their doorstep.

But, and here’s the big but. Before you get any ideas and go out and put these examples above into action, just think about it for a minute. Doing some of these dirty deeds to your ex may make you feel better, but in the long run what might the eventual fall out be?

How is your ex going to react? They could have you arrested and charged, this would not be good. Your ex will be livid, no doubt about that, which was your intention, to pay them back and make them hurt as much as you do. However, what you need to think about here is how will they perceive you and themselves? If you read my articles regularly you will remember me saying people love themselves more than anything else. Therefore, this type of revenge is going to boost their opinion of themselves and even worse they will feel all powerful and bigheaded, because of how you have reacted to being dumped. Think about it, if you were to carry out one of the nasties above, they will feel great that they have all of this power over you.

The other issue to mull over here is whether you think there is the chance of reconciliation. Would you like to win your lover back? Pulling any kind of nasty vengeful trick will kill that possibility in the blink of an eye. 

So what would be the best form of revenge that you could carry out on your ex? The answer is success, sweet success my friend. Success is definitely the best revenge. Your ex will be expecting you to be moping and pining after them, begging them to return. However, you will be getting on with your life, being happy and independent and they will not like this. If your ex sees that you are happy living you life, almost happy about the break up they will not like it at all. You see, they expect to have more power here, as they dumped you. Not the case if you are showing a happy and positive attitude when you run into them, or their friends.

This is where they are going to start to want you again. This is where they will remember why they fell in love with you in the first place. Who can resist a happy smiling face and a happy attitude to life? This is exactly the image you need to portray to exact the perfect revenge.

If they know that you are missing them and pining after them, that will make them run in the other direction. When you stop and walk the other way and get on with your life in a happy and positive way, this is where the tables will turn in your favour. Curiosity will motivate them to chase you. You may well be in a situation to either choose whether to rekindle the relationship or you could well decide that you are indeed, better off without them.

For more information; read No Contact

Fix Your Broken Heart And Discover The Powerful Hidden Secrets To Stop Thinking About Your Ex Once And For Good! Get Your Free ‘Biggest Break up Mistakes’ Mini-Course. Go to: WinBackLove

Pop Star Princess Whitney Houston Dies at Age 48; Gone Too Soon The Herald Sun reported earlier today that the body of legendary singer Whitney Houston has been found in a Beverly Hills Hotel. Feb 11, 2012 - Janelle Coulton

Mental Health Is Not The Only Concern On Valentine's Day With Valentine's Day coming up it seemed appropriate to discuss how this day can affect relationships and mental health. Feb 11, 2012 - Janelle Coulton

Read All Janelle Coulton's Articles at Suite101



Copyright 2012 Janelle Coulton

Stop Your Break Up And Relationship E-books

This is a subject that I have discussed on my website a few times before and it’s one that should be re-visited. With the wide range of relationship E-books available on the online market, it is important to carefully choose the one’s to purchase.

These E-books will promise the prospective customer the earth when it comes to solving their relationship problems. I am here to tell you; buyer beware! Not all of these books can deliver what they say they can.

One point that I raised on the Jel’s Love Lounge homepage recently was about love, real love. When thinking along the lines of wanting that person back into your life, ask yourself: Does this person really love me? Because if they don’t your chances of winning them back into a loving, caring relationship that goes both ways is slim to none, to say the least. And would you want someone who didn’t love you? I don’t think so.

When I went through the same issues three years ago with my long distance lover, I had the chance to get him back. However it came down to two things. Firstly, the fact that I realized just in time that he did not really love me and that I was fooling myself, and secondly there was another man on the horizon who I had become friends with. This is the man that I am living with now, and he loves me like no other man ever has. But I was so very close to making a foolish mistake in taking my ex back. And given the fact, that I now know he never really loved me, I cannot understand why he would even want me back.

I had my doubts from the moment I began employing the strategies in these books, because we were long distance and a fair distance from each other I might add. But one of the books I bought re-assured me that I would be able to succeed even if he was halfway around the world. This particular book was; Cucan Pemo’s “Bring Back the Love of Your Life.” In my case, Pemo’s book worked, however I also had access to several other books and support from a relationship forum which specialized in helping people in a relationship with someone who was commitment phobic, which my ex was. The frustrating part here is I cannot specify which book or website helped me the most, because I used a combination of these and put my own plan into action. However, I would have to say that Cucan Pemo's and Annalyn Cara's E-books' were my top two. I have since read many more books and I have listed them below in order of my preference.


It is a good idea to do some quality surfing of the net and track down as many relationship sites and e-books as you can find. I would then pick out your top five and research them. I know it all sounds too hard, as going through a break up or relationship troubles is tough enough and thinking clearly is the last thing you may be doing at the moment. But, if you want to fix your relationship or if you want your lover back it is in your best interests to get the best information. Below are a few pointers to follow when looking for a relationship advice e-book.

· Grab anything they offer for free and read it thoroughly.

· Email the author and ask questions about their book. Ask a lot of questions.

· Ask the author/s for some relationship advice about your particular situation.

· Sign up for their newsletter. These are always free.


The bottom line is find the book or books that best suit your situation, everyone is different. By this I mean if your husband/wife is leaving you and you have children, doing no contact like some of these books suggest is not going to assist you, as you need to be in friendly contact with your ex for the sake of the children.

The other issue that I should mention is these books will not work for you unless your ex lover truly loves you. The advice in these books may get you back into a relationship with your ex lover, however it will not last very long. Love has to be present for it to last. If you are not sure if your ex ever loved you or loves you now, pay attention to how they treat you and try and remember how you were treated in the past. When times were good, were those times really great? What about the bad times? The bad times are the tell tales signs in any relationship. How a person treats another in bad times will clearly show you whether your ex lover really, truly, loves you. I can’t stress this point enough, when a person really love’s you they will be right beside you in the bad times to help you both get through them. And the sweetest thing about the bad times is; they bring you both closer.

In the end it all boils down to everyone’s individual situation and love sweet love. If I had not woken up and smelt the coffee three years ago. I truly believe my life would not be where it is today. And for that I am will be forever grateful. It can be so easy to fool ourselves into believing that we are loved by our ex mates but sometimes; sadly it is not the case.

In the final wash up it is your choice whether you decide to purchase one of these stop break up manuals to save your relationship or marriage. There are many cases and testimonials that show that the formulas in these books work, however everyone’s situation is different and what I am saying is this; take a good look at your situation and your relationship and do a little research, before you choose to buy one of these books. I have included a list of my top nine at the end of this article.



The following is a list of my favourite relationship repair E-books:



BringBacktheLoveofYourLife

WinBackLove

Get Her Back

12 Simple Rules

SaveYourMarriageToday

KeepYourMarriage

Get Ex Back

50SecretsToABlissfulMarriage

TheRomantic’sCollection

Is Your Partner A Liar?

Know If Someone Is Lying.
Learn Exactly How To Know When
Someone Is Lying. Guaranteed.
www.BustLiars.com

Copyright ©2007, Janelle Coulton

Rekindling Your Lost Love

Your relationship is over. And you’re left with a broken heart. You are wondering how you can get your lover back. Before you jump in boots and all and chase after them, pleading for them to return it might be in your best interests to take a time out and assess the situation. Think carefully before making any decisions. Given, that this person has left you, do you really want them back? You need to analyse what went wrong in the relationship. Did your lover give you a reason for leaving? There are many people who will do this; leave a relationship and not tell you the reason. It has happened to me, and based on that, I decided I never wanted anything to with them again.

At first I did want him back and I made it my business to set this process in motion. The very first thing that I did was to take some time out and I did not contact him during this time. Five long weeks of no-contact took place and then I heard from him, he was sorry, he was confused, he didn’t know what he wanted; the excuses came thick and fast. He kept up regular phone and email contact for about two months and then one day I wrote him an email, an honest account of how I saw our relationship, it proved to be the kiss of death. Apart from one nasty email about a profile of mine that he’d found on a dating site, that was it and my cue to forget him and move on. I was essentially fooling myself. He was not coming back, and if he had the relationship would have never amounted to what I needed from him in a relationship.

I am now with someone who is with me for the right reasons. He wants an honest and open relationship and he wants to be a loving person to me and our relationship in every way. Yes; we have our share of problems (every relationship does), but things work between us as we share the same values and we do not compromise our beliefs. My previous lover expected me to compromise my values. He expected me to ignore many aspects of my life and be there for him and I was not prepared to do it. He realised in the end that he could not control me. And it wasn’t until the end that I realised the whole relationship had been a game to him. He had been controlled by women all of his life, starting with his mother and I think he was trying to prove that he could have the upper hand with me. It didn’t work, his stupid emotional games sent me running in the opposite direction.

So before you move heaven and earth to re-kindle your love, think long and hard about whether you really want to be with that person. Think about how you were treated in the relationship, particularly the bad times. If your partner treated you with respect and honoured your feelings at all times, then I would say you have a winner. Sadly though, when things turn sour in a relationship, people forget about respect and honouring the other person. It becomes all about them.

Copyright © 2007 Janelle Coulton



Get Back With Your Ex. His New Lover Doesn't
Want You To Know This: www.dontbreakup.com




Are They Lying To You?

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So You Want Your Ex-Lover Back

It is so very important that you take some time for yourself, take a breather and stop and take stock of the situation and your feelings before you make the decision to chase after your ex and try to win them back. Your decisions must be based on logic and not emotion. You must take a good look at yourself and the relationship and what it brought to your life before you rush in and start the process of trying to get your ex back.

Asking yourself why you want them back is a good start. You need to understand your feelings and thoughts and be honest about whether you really want this person in life on a permanent basis. It is important that you do not rush this. You will get to the truth the longer you spend alone with your thoughts. You need to look deep inside yourself and be honest about your feelings. Do you really love them, or are you just lonely? This is an easy mistake to make. Missing that person can make you falsely believe you love them, when in-fact you are just lonely and this is not a good enough reason to re-kindle a relationship. If you just miss them, then consider getting yourself a life and finding a partner whom you truly love with all of your heart.

Looking at what went wrong in the relationship is paramount in this situation. If you don’t explore why he or she broke up the relationship, you will not be able to repair the relationship, for example; if your partner told you that they felt taken for granted and that there was not enough affection and love within the relationship, you will need to rectify this problem. You will need to consider changing this about yourself. The relationship will not survive a second go around if you are not prepared to learn from your mistakes, change your behaviour and grow within the relationship. This is why we have relationships, to learn, change and grow. They have dumped you, and they have done this for a reason, chances are it is mostly you who will need to make the changes here necessary for the relationship to flourish.

Once you have worked through the above suggestions, it would be a good idea to set up a meeting, if you feel ready. If not give yourself some more time. Do you feel ready to make the effort to get this relationship back on track? If so, call your ex-lover and them to meet for coffee. Chances are they will agree, especially if your relationship was very special to both of you. Tell them about the work that you have done and the conclusions that you have drawn and explain what is going to change. If your lover still has feelings for you, there is a very good chance that this will work. Nothing in life is ever certain however, to give up on someone that you really love who could possibly be in your life again is worth the risk.

Stick to your promises, and keep your word. Make your actions mimic your words. You have decided to give your relationship a second try, so you must be true to your word and make a committed effort to see it through. Portraying the person you promised to be to your lost love is your top priority. Your relationship will work, as long as you remain true to your words and yourself.

Getting your ex lover back is really not so difficult, providing you both feel the same way about each other. This is a process we go through when we want something bad enough. Your ex will notice the changes in you and the relationship and they will appreciate the effort you are making. So in the end it all becomes worthwhile to dedicate all you can to sustain your relationship. I wish you all the best.


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Copyright © 2007 Janelle Coulton